Virginia’s Blog

I returned yesterday from a quick, unexpected trip to Memphis. My granddad passed away on Thursday. On the flight back, I reflected on the weekend. It has had a profound impact on me. I haven’t gone to a lot of funerals in my life, but several of the others I’ve attended have been so different from this one. My dad’s family is very open about the process of grieving, and kept Granddaddy very close to us by retelling his stories throughout the weekend. They are not afraid to grieve over the ugliness of the fall, and the resulting separation from God and each other that death (spiritual and physical) brings. There is a rawness to grief, and it is a reminder that this is not the way things are supposed to be…even when someone lives almost 85 years of great life. But there was also a clinging to, a rejoicing over the fact that Christ has cancelled this curse, and that we, too, will worshop and exist unhindered by sin and worldly affections, alongside our Granddaddy. As my cousin’s husband, Darren, who gave the eulogy said, spiritually speaking, Thursday was the best day in Granddad’s life. Granddad’s pastor was in India doing missions at the time of his death and hated to not be there for the funeral, but he had one of his son’s read a reflection he wrote on the impact of Granddad’s life. He also gave a charge to Granny B., who has spent her days caring for Granddad. He said he knew she would be a great prayer warrior in her remaining days. One of my fondest memories was in Granny B. and Granddad’s later years. When I would visit them, I would always find them in the morning sitting in the living room with coffee and their Bibles. They would take turns reading aloud, and then they would recite the Lord’s prayer together, followed by prayers for the family.

On a funny note, the pastor’s son shared that he always looked forward to being invited the Braddock household as a child for dinner. He said he didn’t know anywhere other than Piccadilly that you could have roast, lasagna, garlic bread, spinach casserole, three vegetables, and at least three choices of dessert. That is a very familiar scenario for me!

After the burial in Falkner, MS, we all gathered at my Aunt Diane’s house to eat and share stories. I will share a few in the coming days. I wanted to share a photo of the program from the funeral. It is such a great depiction of my granddad. He kept an amazing garden every year. This picture was taken last summer, at age 84.

May God’s mercies be new to Granny B. each morning, as she adjusts to a very different life. She and Granddad were married for 62 years.

We now have communion every week at our church. Stan and I have started serving, and it has been such a blessing to us. Everyone comes forward to take communion, and volunteers serve the bread and juice to all, after the pastor talks about the sacrament and prays. I didn’t really expect to feel so overwhelmed by serving. But standing at the front of the church and watching all of the varied people come forward to share in a common meal is amazing to me. I just can’t help but think about Jesus’ love for his people…his people who look so different and have such different gifts and personalities…but who are united in sharing this meal.

I have now passed into a new decade. I had a fabulous day doing so. Here’s what happened.

• Friday night, after I put Ginna to bed, I walked into the living room to find Stan had bought some little cheesecakes and chocolate dipped strawberries and set the table for us to enjoy together.
• Saturday morning, Stan made breakfast. He made spinach, goat cheese, and tomato omelettes and bought my favorite cinnamon crunch bagels at Panera to serve with them.
• Ginna and Jamey gave me a Tinkerbell movie and some chocolate. Stan gave me a gift certificate to enjoy some time at a spa getting a massage, facial, manicure, and pedicure. I’ve never enjoyed such pampering and can’t wait to do it!
• I went swimming in the afternoon and did a little shopping alone.
• Stan and I went to dinner at Hermosa Beach last night and shared seafood paella, grilled ravioli with fresh salsa, and a caesar salad. It was great!

I mentioned that I would make a cake for my birthday…and several people wondered about that. But I have to tell you, if you are a chocolate lover, and you tasted this cake, you’d make if for yourself, too!! I’ll post the recipe this week. Here’s a photo of a slice.

And here’s the breakfast:

A friend of mine has a child of similar personality and temperament to Ginna (intense, spirited, energetic, expressive, etc.), but he is two years older. Last week, we were talking about discipline, and she encouraged me by telling me that she sees signs at age five much more so than at younger ages that teachings are penetrating his heart.  It seems so often that Stan and I have the heart in mind when we discipline Ginna (i.e., we don’t want to only control behavior for our comfort and reputation but rather we want Ginna’s heart to be molded to love God and others). But at this age, we don’t often see the fruit of our efforts reflected in the way Ginna communicates her understanding. However, in the past week, I’ve seen a few signs of the Word and teachings penetrating, and I am encouraged.

Scenario 1: 

We had a particularly hard day on Thursday. Ginna was out of line much of the day. We created scenes in public and had difficult interchanges at home (mostly relating to disrespectful/challenging words….asserting independence). When Stan came home we talked about the day and how it should have been different. Then I took Ginna to bed. Before we pray together, we talk about what we will pray for. That night I asked Ginna if there was anything she needed to tell God she was sorry for. She said, “I need to say sorry for the rude things I said.” And then she did.

Scenario 2:

My sister and her husband are experiencing a particularly difficult time right now. Ginna and I have talked about it quite a bit, and we pray for them together. A few mornings ago, we were saying our “God, please give us kind hearts today” prayer. I said, “Ginna, remember we should pray for Aunt Elizabeth and Uncle Ben.” She said, “Oh, yes, Mom. They are having a hard time right now. Let’s pray for them.”

Moments like these are encouragement to a parent’s heart.

And then there is:

Artistic, dramatic, inspired, creative, sporadic, and can-respond-with-a-well-thought-out-response-in-a-moment, and, well…ruffled… He created him.

AND

Scientific, predictable, task-oriented and bent on order, creative, scheduled, pensive, and unruffled He created her.

So here’s the story that has inspired such a comparison. For four and a half years, I have done the laundry in the house.  At times, when Stan has been looking for a particular item of clothing and cannot find it, he has hoped that I will be able to state its whereabouts, since I washed it and put it away. As I mentioned yesterday, my memory does not store such bits of information. Whenever I’ve become frustrated with these inquiries, Stan has admonished me to stop doing his laundry and let him do it…but with the caveat that he will wear everything he owns before starting to wash anything. I have resisted this.

Well, finally, a few weeks ago, I decided to go for it. I could not convince Stan that there is no secret closet where I hide his favorite clothing articles. And my memory could not keep track of his every shirt, pant, and sock.

So, now I do my laundry and the kids’ laundry…and he does his…in a manner according to the personality traits above. AND he’s much happier!! Here’s a comparison of the before and after:

Before the change: Virginia did all laundry. All clothes were washed within 2-3 days of entering the laundry basket. All items were promptly folded and put in the proper room upon being dried.

After the change: The above circumstances apply for 3 members of the household. Regarding Stan, he has clothes ALL OVER the floor on his side of the bed. Nothing ever gets folded. He keeps it in the laundry basket CLEAN and finds what he needs from there. And he is HAPPIER?!?!? Stan does admit that his system works well for him because we live in CA, and he wears black t-shirts and jeans to work on a regular basis.

Can anyone please explain this to me????

P.S. Stan approved this message. J And while I was teaching tonight…he did three loads of laundry…even washing ALL articles of the other members of the house….the said articles are in the basket with his clothes as I write.

I have several posts I’ve been meaning to write lately….but time has not allowed. This is one that I’ve been thinking about, particularly after reading the discussion on Lee’s blog about Baby Wise and other philosophies of parenting and sleep.

I truly think that parents-to-be cannot be prepared for the toll that being awakened takes on a person. Whew. I think I am still in a fog! Some nights are better than others. For instance, last Wednesday, both kids were coughing and up at least every other hour all night. That was a bad night. The past few nights, I’ve been up between 1 and 3 times a night. Those were fairly good nights. What I find really frustrating is when the kids wake up and go back to sleep…and I can’t go back to sleep!

Anyway, Ginna generally wakes up at least once a night. After her sleeping through the night from about 13 months until 2…it was shocking to me to have her start waking up…and be able to walk through the house to get to our room! One strategy we use is a “Noah bed.” The name came about when our friends stayed with us last September. We made a place on the floor for their son, Noah, to sleep. Ginna thought it looked pretty fun. So ever since, whenever she puts a blanket and pillow on the floor, it’s a “Noah bed.” So, our recent rule has been to allow her to sleep on a Noah bed on our floor if she awakens in the middle of the night, rather than getting in our bed. It is sometimes quite effective. And she hasn’t come into our room to sleep at all for the past two nights! Woo hoo!

I am wondering if my brain will return to normal one day…or if the years of being awakened will leave a very permanent mark. Thankfully, I can remember things that I file in the “important” box….but things like “Did I really put my keys on that shelf?” or “Did you wash my jeans?” don’t find a place. I have no idea which articles I went through my hands while doing the laundry….I just know that if it was in the dirty clothes, it is now in the closet.

Several people have requested the recipe for my strawberry cake. So here it is (in its regular, not birthday-ified form). We regularly make four cakes around here, with a few other less often. This is one of  the four (the other three being carrot cake, german chocolate cake, and a chocolate ganache cake that is sure to excite the senses of any chocolate lover…maybe I’ll post that one next! I made one last week for my friend’s birthday…and I”ll probably make one for myself for my bday in a few days! ) Ok, so here’s the recipe.

Cake:

¾ cup sliced strawberries

2 cups granulated sugar

6 Tbsp butter, softened

1 (3 oz) package strawberry flavored gelatin

3 large eggs

2 ½ cups flour

2 ½ teaspoons baking powder

1 ¼ cups milk

1 tsp vanilla

Filling:

1 ½ cups whipped cream (or Cool Whip)

½ tsp vanilla

Frosting:

8 oz. cream cheese (I use reduced fat)

¼ cup butter, softened

¼ tsp vanilla

1 cup powdered sugar

Remaining Ingredients:

¾ cup sliced strawberries

1 ½ cups quartered strawberries

1.       Preheat oven to 350 degrees F.

2.       Place ¾ cups sliced strawberries in a blender and process until smooth.

3.       Place 2 cups sugar, butter, and gelatin in a bowl; beat with a mixer at medium speed until blended. Add eggs.

4.       Combine flour and baking powder. Add to sugar mixture alternately with milk. Stir in pureed strawberries and vanilla.

5.       Pour batter into 2 9” cake pans coated with cooking spray and flour. Bake at 350 degrees for 45 minutes or until a wooden pick inserted in the center comes out clean. Cool in the pans 10 minutes on a wire rack.

6.       To prepare filling, combine whipped cream and vanilla.

7.       To prepare frosting, beat cream cheese, butter, and vanilla until well blended. Add sugar.

8.       Place one cake layer on a plate. Spread half of the filling. Arrange ¾ cups sliced strawberries over filling. Top with other cake layer. Spread remaining filling over top. Spread frosting over sides of cake. Arrange quartered strawberries on top of the cake.

Ginna had a birthday party today at our house. Her only request was to have a strawberry cake. I tried to make a cake I saw in a magazine that had intentionally tilted layers. It turned out looking rather unintentional! Stan compared the result to what post-modernism has done to architecture…I tried to achieve something unique, but the form suffered. Oh, well. I couldn’t follow the magazine directions because I don’t use cake mix…and I wanted whipped cream and strawberries between the layers. Ginna thought it was beautiful…and it was very tasty!

We got Ginna her own camera…she LOVES taking pictures!

Wing and Granddaddy got her baby some new clothes.

Uncle Ben, Aunt Elizabeth, and Rebecca gave her an Easter basket with her name on it and a new hat.

Here is Ginna modeling new things…a new hair band and a Fancy Nancy tutu!

The kids loved using the sidewalk chalk.

Birthdays are really fun for three year olds!!

Ginna celebrated her birthday with her classmates on Friday. She brought her favorite items for ice cream sundaes. She loved making the sundaes and passing them out to all of her friends.

Jamey loves sitting in the little chairs!

Mrs. Shepherd and Ms. Cindi know my daughter! They got her two bags and some butterfly wings.

We’ve had a bike trailer since December…but Jamey has been very reluctant to wear a helmet (aka, he screams when we put it on)…..until yesterday. We were able to ride for quite a while to a park, play for a while, and then return. It was a great afternoon! What made the difference? Jamey found a pair of pliers that we keep in the trailer in the event that its attachment to the bike becomes loose. He played with them the entire time! Boys and tools!